Updated: Jun 29
OH what can I say that hasn't already been said by millions of people aghast at the latest loss of rights for uterus having people in the US.... Not much! So I channeled my rage into developing this pattern.
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Not crafty? You can purchase your own Angry Uterus Keychain below instead!
Angry Uterus Keychain - FREE Crochet Pattern
15yds pink yarn, worsted weight
2yds ecru yarn
½ yd black yarn
2- 4mm safety eyes
4.0mm G crochet hook
4 sts x 4 rows = 1”
Pattern is written in US crochet terms, stitch count is listed in [x] at the end of each round. Pattern is worked in rounds, do not join or ch 1 at the end of the row. Though it appears simple this is likely best for an advanced beginner or intermediate crochet skills or for those familiar with amigurumi construction including increases, decreases, and assembly.
Body – make 1
With pink, form a magic circle and sc 6 into circle 
2sc in each st 
*sc, 2sc, repeat from * x 6 
*sc 2, 2sc, repeat from * x 6 
7. *sc 5, dec, repeat from * x 3 
8. *sc 4, dec, repeat from * x 3 
Insert safety eyes between rows 6 & 7, 3 stitches apart
Begin to add batting
9. *sc, dec, repeat from * x 6 
10. *sc, dec, repeat from 8 x 3 
Finish adding batting to desired fullness
11. *sc, dec, repeat from * x 3 
12. Sc 6
Finish off and leave long tail.
Ovary/Tube – make 2
With ecru, form a magic circle and sc 6 into circle 
4. Change to pink, sc, dec, sc, dec 
5. Sc 4 x 8 rows [32 total stitches]
6. Finish off and leave long tail.
Using black yarn stitch eyebrows and mouth. If not using safety eyes also stitch eyes and finish off. Using pink tail at the bottom of the organ, draw yarn through body and out top center. Attach keyring by stitching over it 4-5 times, secure yarn and finish off. Attach ovary/tube between rows 4-5 on either side of the body, secure ovary with 2-3 stitches between rows 8-9, secure yarn and finish off.
Attach to your key-ring and enjoy! Smash that patriarchy!
Makes the perfect accent to your mace, whistle, and knuckle spears.